Long intro, new song.

You know what annoys me more than a mosquito in my bedroom on a hot Summer night? Those FB posers who hawk T-shirts or make fake accounts in your favorite celebrity’s name and try to friend you.

Steve Poltz is one of my favorite entertainers and particularly hard hit with this sort of imposterism. I got followed by a faker and that just lit the Latin in me on fire so yesterday morning over my bagel and coffee, I wrote this…

My Stalker The Imposter ©️Cia Mauskopf 2024

You think you can fool me, known him too long for that
Seen him back when he was short haired, 98 lbs dripping wet
When tacos were a super dilemma and he lost one left shoe
When he played small rooms and his rug was getting burned

I’m an old fan, you’re a big sham, a really smooth talker
I bet you’re a fat greasy woman behind a computer
Eating stale pizza while you try to sell us fools gold
No matter what you say you’re just not Steve Poltz

Don’t ask me to talk and don’t  DM, it’s not up for persuasion
Your words are in English but your dialect is Malaysian
Now my profile has a new follower, a guy named Steve Poltz
I have a stalker, such an imposter, sadly you’re not even close.

Taking his name in vain won’t do you no good
I’m to savvy for that in this cold digital world
Cuz I Knew him when that internet was just in infancy
Thieving his name won’t bring you cash, fame or infamy

You can try all you like we’ve all got your number
Whether it’s prez of his fan club or some tee shirt hawker
You don’t even talk like him and to be honest this is getting so old
Because no matter what your words say, ya ain’t Steve Poltz

I have a stalker, such an imposter and not even Steve Poltz….